Friday, December 5, 2008

Keep your Happy Friends Close By !

I like to listen to the Today Show and catch snippets of information. Today's Today snippet was on whether happiness is contagious. Turns out it is! And people's proximity matters as well!

* A happy friend that lives within 1/2 mile of you - you will be 42% happier

* A happy friend that lives within 1 mile of you - 25% happier

* Happy next door neighbors - 34% happier

* Happy sibling - 12% happier

* Happy co-workers - no bump in your happiness

We are herd animals. We need each other. We derive energy from each other. And we need this source of energy close by us to really impact our sense of well-being.

Of course, we are sympathetic and helpful when a friend is in a rough place. It feels important and good to be of service to others in need. But for the sake of this study, they're just talking about the contagion factor of "happiness."

We need to be around happy people. It is no small matter! The energy we emit affects those around us. It's all about energy. If you want some scientific data on the phenomenon of this energy transfer, I recommend Masaru Emoto's book, The Hidden Messages in Water and other fascinating research in my summary report. You can find this summary of the latest leading edge researchers in Energy Psychology and EFT under "scientific research" on my website.

It's worth considering how you can optimize your life by developing proximity to the people who make you laugh and feel light-hearted. It's easy to get too busy and forget about the need to be with these people. Gather your happy friends around you! Develop and nurture your relationships with your neighbors. You'll feel better - and so will they! This is a contagion to definitely catch!!

End Emotional Eating with EFT

I'll never forget one of my obese client's stories. She's 6 years old, taken to the local bar with her alcoholic father. She's the princess of the pub. "A big juicy hamburger and huge plate of fries was always set in front of me. My eyes would light up. I took one bite and the world melted away. I felt my body melt right under the table with that juicy meat and bun. The fries kept me melted and gone."

Why do people eat when they are not hungry? According to the foundational theory of Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT), people overeat to tranquilize unresolved negative emotions and traumas. Recent research has established that obese people overeat because their food cravings are controlled by the same part of the brain that control drug cravings in addicts. This brain circuitry located in the hippocampus is also the part of the brain that is involved with emotion.

People are already conquering food cravings by addressing their unresolved emotional issues with EFT - and they have been doing so for more than a decade. EFT involves fingertip tapping on select acupressure points while focusing on the craving in question. EFT claims an 80% success rate in calming the emotions that trigger food cravings.

I've worked with compulsive eaters and chronic dieters for over 18 years. I find EFT to be the most effective tool for helping people rid themselves of uncontrollable urges and cravings for food. People who overeat don't have a food problem or a willpower problem. They have a problem dealing with difficult emotions without the aid of food.

In private practice and in the 15 years of teaching a course for overeaters, my clients consistently express this "yearning" feeling, this "nagging/driven" feeling to go hunt for food. It comes from unresolved emotion - there is no doubt in my mind. When we clear up the hidden emotions, along with breaking out of the diet mentality, they find a normal relationship to food and find their body going back to a normal size. EFT makes this process easier than ever before.

Gary Craig, founder of EFT, reports, "I see repeatedly that emotional issues like fear, anger, boredom, shame, and resentment are the very centerpiece of someone's weight gain. But their emotional issues have remained unresolved despite willpower and conventional therapies. This is because the emotional issues have disrupted their energy meridian system(or Chi in Chinese Medicine). Until the energy system is balanced, the emotional eating will continue."

I am thrilled we have EFT. It balances the energy system in a way that allows people to finally take control and manage whatever emotion that needs attention without stuffing or distracting themselves with food. It's an amazing new freedom to be free around food and with your body! It's a life-changer.

If you are concerned about your relationship with your emotions and your food cravings, give me a call at 303-300-6733 and we can discuss if you would be eligible for joining a class to gain freedom around food.

Sunday, November 9, 2008

Calling all Coaches - Your Brightest and Best Athletes Need You

Are you frustrated with the results of your brightest and best athletes?

Do you wonder why they can show flashes of brilliance and then choke, in the most crucial of times? Or the most unlikely of times?

It's your job to find out. It's not your job to "fix" these mental lapses. But it's essential you know that mental skills training is available and powerful in its results. You owe it to your athletes to give them all they need to be successful. It's what you want.

Being an athletic coach is an amazing job. You're involved in the sport you have always loved and most likely played yourself. You get to work with other athletes who hold the same passion you do. You also are responsible for shaping and leading younger minds than yours. You are responsible for not just honing their skills as an athlete but also motivating them to play above and beyond their optimal ability in every situation imaginable. It's a tall order. If you take your job seriously, it's not easy. And it is amazingly rewarding.

There's always an expectation for the brightest and best athletes. After all, they've been performing above and beyond all the rest since grade school. They have had advantageous training that other athletes could only hope to get . . . the camps, special clinics, private lessons from top coaches. And then the expectations begin to really rise. Now there is just not the pressure of "having a good game" but to get that college scholarship. Not just any college scholarship, but the scholarship. And after the scholarship is the pressure to prove yourself worthy of it - to hold your own while playing in the big pond.

One can argue that the high expectations, the expectation of success, could, in fact, help create the success. We've known for a very long time that when you expect good , you get good. The self fulfilling prophecy. And we particularly know with our new research in how thoughts create reality, that when the athlete's own thoughts are aligned with success, success naturally follows.

For many athletes, however, the expectation is one they unconsciously resist. They "blow it" for a few holes in golf, or the 3rd quarter of the basketball game, or begin to lose their serve and have no idea what's going on for themselves. This is where more coaching can't help, but some astute attention to the mental gymnastics of the athlete can turn things around.

In today's world of competitive sports it is essential to be a coach who understands that his athletes need coaching with the mental side of the game as much as they need more practice on the physical skills of the sport. The saying, "You don't know what you don't know" really applies here. I often find this true in the area of coaches with their athletes. Many coaches think the answer to a game played poorly or to a match that never should have been lost, is to just practice harder and longer. It just is not so. In fact, it can do more harm.

The tennis star didn't start to lose his serve because he didn't know how to serve anymore. . . or that she was tired. But there could have been several sneaky thoughts running through this athlete's unconscious that were not only distracting, but downright took the wind out of this player's sails. The list of blocking thoughts are endless. We'll go over several specific examples of them in an upcoming blog - stay tuned! Your brightest and best need you to know!

I'm a good coach - but I could be a great coach!

I'll never forget it. I'm at a coach's clinic of 900 some high school and university athletic coaches. This large man with a teddy bear appearance walks up to me, looks me straight in the eyes and says, "I'm a good coach, and I know I could be a great coach." There was no doubt about it. This man possessed great leadership and a caring heart for his athletes. He also possessed a fair number of inner demons.

This university football coach was quite taken with the EFT method. He didn't think EFT strange at all ( people tell me "strong" men won't do EFT - I've never experienced this) and after his experience of immediate results, he was sold on it. He and I worked together on several things that had been silent and powerful blocks against him taking full control of his ability to lead. Some layers of being humiliated and embarrassed as a young man were cleared. (This seems to come up with my successful male clients frequently.) We were able to incorporate full forgiveness for some things he had done in his 20's that he felt shame for. The relief, the lightening of his spirit were palpable.

He called me nearly two years after our work was completed. "Bernadette, I'm a better coach, I'm a better husband and father; I don't get upset and angry like I used to. I've lost 25 pounds because I don't drink as much, and I've kept it going. When I get stressed, I shut the door to my office and start tapping!"

I don't need a testimonial here. The important thing is that if you are committed to improving an area of your life - in this case, a coaching career - you will find improvements occurring in many areas as you discover the universality of EFT. I encourage everybody to fully utilize the EFT method in any area of their life. It usually is amazing what hidden blocks will just pop out of the unconscious, and from that place they can be tapped on and neutralized.

You're good - and you could be Great!

Sunday, June 1, 2008

Launch your best golf game.

Are you missing puts and shots that you would normally make?

Thoughts are the controlling forces for your actions. What are you thinking as you are taking that shot?
1st tee off:
"People are looking at me."
"I never do well on the 1st hole"
"It's too windy for me to play well."
"I just don't know how to chip"
"I am going to skull it over the green!"
"I don't feel comfortable with my putter."
"I need a new putter!"
And the list goes on.

Are you tired of these negative unconscious thoughts? You can work on the exterior mechanics of your golf game, now let's work on the interior mechanics of your mental game.
Mastering the inner game -- 80% of golf is mental. Don't miss out on the biggest and best area for improvement -- your thoughts!